"I think right now I'm a little more confused than I am enlightened."
Today our wonderful institution of higher learning harkened upon the enlightening presence of His Holiness, the Dalai Lama. This was a historic day where the merging of the Jesuit tradition and centuries-old Buddhist thought came together in our own place of worship, Leavey Center: home to Santa Clara Broncos basketball team. A dozen elementary age children singing slightly off key set the mood as protesters raged outside about His Holiness' alleged deceitfulness.
In true SCU fashion, extreme levels of religious piety in the air managed to disable the internet connection for the 4/5ths of the university population that did not receive tickets due to the failing of the internet in the first place. **cough f***ing up cough** The controversy is shedding light to the ongoing IT troubles taking the Broncos by storm.
"We are all hoping that His Holiness' presence will finally solve this earth-shattering internet problem that continues to cripple our campus," said an SCU sophomore.
Product placement was at an all time high as the Dalai Lama's favorite burgundy foam visor was swiftly replaced by Father Engh christening His Holiness with his very own Santa Clara University visor. This $15 value from the campus bookstore in a familiar burgundy color was chosen so as not to clash with the wonderful contrast of burgundy and gold robes His Holiness donned for the event.
Opening up the hour-and-a-half event was a heavily breathing middle-aged man that left us all asking, "Who is this guy?" Following his all star performance was His Holiness himself who still managed to enlighten us despite more IT troubles with the microphone. Words could not describe the overwhelming amount of compassion and wisdom from this gentle man, primarily because we couldn't hear them in the first place. A smirk, a few bows of the head, and his infectious laughter captivated the audience during the entirety of his 20 minute talk.
After being exhausted from the amount of mental energy exerted to comprehend the profound messages of this modern-day Yoda, listeners took the opportunity to indulge themselves in a much needed slumber. After what sounded oddly reminiscent of a healthcare debate, listeners tuned back in when the ever-"pressing" issue of prostate exams was introduced. His Holiness himself simply couldn't contain composure after the interpretation of what was really being said was brought to his attention.
All in all, in was an enlightening day focused on compassion, failing internet connections, and His Holiness' affinity for visors.
Today our wonderful institution of higher learning harkened upon the enlightening presence of His Holiness, the Dalai Lama. This was a historic day where the merging of the Jesuit tradition and centuries-old Buddhist thought came together in our own place of worship, Leavey Center: home to Santa Clara Broncos basketball team. A dozen elementary age children singing slightly off key set the mood as protesters raged outside about His Holiness' alleged deceitfulness.
In true SCU fashion, extreme levels of religious piety in the air managed to disable the internet connection for the 4/5ths of the university population that did not receive tickets due to the failing of the internet in the first place. **cough f***ing up cough** The controversy is shedding light to the ongoing IT troubles taking the Broncos by storm.
"We are all hoping that His Holiness' presence will finally solve this earth-shattering internet problem that continues to cripple our campus," said an SCU sophomore.
Product placement was at an all time high as the Dalai Lama's favorite burgundy foam visor was swiftly replaced by Father Engh christening His Holiness with his very own Santa Clara University visor. This $15 value from the campus bookstore in a familiar burgundy color was chosen so as not to clash with the wonderful contrast of burgundy and gold robes His Holiness donned for the event.
Opening up the hour-and-a-half event was a heavily breathing middle-aged man that left us all asking, "Who is this guy?" Following his all star performance was His Holiness himself who still managed to enlighten us despite more IT troubles with the microphone. Words could not describe the overwhelming amount of compassion and wisdom from this gentle man, primarily because we couldn't hear them in the first place. A smirk, a few bows of the head, and his infectious laughter captivated the audience during the entirety of his 20 minute talk.
After being exhausted from the amount of mental energy exerted to comprehend the profound messages of this modern-day Yoda, listeners took the opportunity to indulge themselves in a much needed slumber. After what sounded oddly reminiscent of a healthcare debate, listeners tuned back in when the ever-"pressing" issue of prostate exams was introduced. His Holiness himself simply couldn't contain composure after the interpretation of what was really being said was brought to his attention.
All in all, in was an enlightening day focused on compassion, failing internet connections, and His Holiness' affinity for visors.